You don't look like a runner...

{Ran 35 minutes--- Didn't track mileage}

I just wanted to run to run tonight with no stress.  I didn't even want to keep track of mileage, I just wanted to run.  Its just been one of those days.  I ended up having training meetings today and traveled about 4 hours of my 12 hour work day in the car.  Ugh.  I'm not a fan of traveling that far for work meetings.  And I have to do it 2 more times this week!  The absolute worst part about the meetings is when the company "pays" for lunch.  Today the guys chose some Chinese buffet.  First of all, I hardly believe that a lot of that stuff they make in those Chinese places are authentic, I mean its covered in grease!!  Everything is deep fried.  Could it really be "authentic"?  Chinese people are small, and I really doubt that a buffet is a common thing in their homeland.  But, I could be very wrong...I've never been to China, and I'm not Chinese.  But, I imagine all types of rice, fresh steamed vegetables, fresh meats.  The food I had today definitely was NOT what I imagined.  I felt sick afterwards, and I only ate about 1/4 cup of rice with a few veggies on top, and a side salad. Anyways..... 

My favorite part of my day came a few minutes after I ate the nasty Chinese food.  We were asked to introduce ourselves and explain what departments we worked for, and to tell something "unique" about ourselves.   Since my Half Marathon this weekend has been on my mind, I decided to tell them that I loved to run and that I was running my 2nd Half Marathon this weekend.  Cool.  People seemed interested.  Then, while at lunch the other woman in the group said, "Thats great that you like to run, I would have never guessed, you don't really look like a runner".  My heart sank.  I mean, I know I'm not skinny by any means, but that doesn't mean I can't run 13 miles.  I've been frustrated with myself the last few months because even with all the hard work I've put into running and training, I haven't lost much weight.  Even with my healthy eating habits and counting every morsel that goes into my mouth-- I haven't lost anything.  As hard as I tried to not be offended, I couldn't help but think "Yeah, I know- I don't look like a runner, even though I feel like one sometimes.  But, I really don't think I'll ever look like a runner."

Part of me is sick of training for races...I just want to do something other than run.  I want to do Kickboxing, cycling, strength training, even maybe buy Turbo Fire or P90X or Insanity.  I just want my scale to move....and feel confident enough to be considered "a runner".   There are just those days I feel I can conquer the world...today is just not one of them.  But, you know what?  I will pick myself up and move on, and totally ROCK my Half Marathon this weekend--- "runner" or not-- I am giving it my all!